It's been a while since my last posting, I know, but you see, right after the humans in my household got rid of their bugs our computer got some of its own. About a week ago, everything running doubly slow or unresponsive. So I turn off and on the computer a couple of times, as always, and POOF! I open my INBOX to find all emails from 9/9/2003 to 6/3/2008 just GONE. As in POOF. Five years of emails vanished, relocated to some faraway cyber dump. Then my back up system claims that they never were in the first place and, well, you can imagine that we experienced a bit of Twilight Zone confusion. Five years of emails...important, trivial, funny, sad, you name it...vanished. I was overwhelmed at first and more than a little dumbfounded. Friends responded in various ways. One told me that I was kinda a numbnut to have accumulated five years of emails in my Inbox in the first place. Another encouraged me to feel liberated and relieved that the 'foolish, inhuman junk of email correspondance' was gone forever.
Once I started to get a little distance on the matter, I did, indeed, start to feel, oh, I don't know...lighter? Yes, I'll say it...relieved. Maybe email is supposed to be like whispers in the hallway, off-the-cuff phone conversations and shout-outs...like post-its that ought be crumpled and tossed at day's or week's or, at the most, month's end. I'm always throwing shit out, or at least trying to throw away what is unnessary or unused, always trying to make some more room. Why should the things on my computer be granted any more mercy? "Just toss it," I can hear my mother saying. "If it's not beautiful or useful, then toss it." No reason to grant the old hard drive immunity to such a golden rule, right?
I was originally panicked, thinking of all the sentiment lost, thinking of how I wouldn't be able to go back and review/remember/reminisce on my life through my old emails. The truth is that I'm too busy in my life right now that I haven't the time to go back anyway. And when I do finally find the time, I hope that I will use it to finally learn Italian, or guitar, or take up jazz singing, or do one of the freakin' thousand and one things on one of my freakin' dozen or so lists of things to do...
Sometimes bugs happen for reasons beyond our immediate comprehension. Like everything else in life.
Even the Hair Fairies already seem a quaint and distant memory.
Good nite. --K
